P*i*c*k*-*u*p L*i*n*e*s*

I'm not making these up. These are things that have actually been said to me or people I know. Occasionally I've left names out to protect the guilty ;)

"Hi. I'm really high right now, and I was just wondering if you would take me home with you and let me be your teddy bear."
- random guy on the streets of Northampton,
accosting my roommate Heidi
"Seeking friends for random acts of passion through senseless inebriation on our massaging chair"
- a personal ad

"Together we can make mud..."
- a Cancer (Water sign), speaking to a Virgo and a Taurus (both Earth signs)
"You're going to have a really nice body when you're twenty-five."
- paraphrase of a comment said to me in a Swiss goth club, by a guy who thought I was seventeen
(Maybe I just misunderstood his French... but I don't think so)
"Tu veux bouger un peu?" ("Do you want to move a little?")
- another guy in the same club.
He was trying to ask me, in his own personal French-slang sort of way, if I wanted
to dance with him, but I thought he was asking me to move over so there would be
room for him to sit down... Ah, the joys of language barriers.
- actually said to me and my girlfriend by some random guys as we walked down a street in Amsterdam
"C'est mon fantasme..." ("It's my fantasy...")
- drunk guy in a French goth club, to me and my girlfriend
"What's a guy like you doing in a dog collar?"
      - Jace, in a club, to Joe
"It was a cat collar!"
      - Joe, later, to me

"Je sens que je vous aime de l'amour le plus violent."
- Julien, a character in Stendhal's Le Rouge et le Noir, to a woman he has met five minutes ago and never sees again
(okay, so this one's not from real life. Deal.)
"Sweetheart, I need a girl like you. Not just for a moment - for forever!"
- older Dominican man in Washington Heights, as I passed by
"Hey Cinderella, how YOU doin'?"
- random guy in a car as I crossed the street in NYC

Take me back to Beth's Personal Stuff!